Blurbotron

Marty has a heart of gold. He once told me the story of slapper joe, the ostrich who ate from the ketchup jar with cartoon like precision. He lost a finger for that. Thank you, Marty!-Gabriela, paper connoisseur, Los Angeles

Tempus Fugit

Oyez

Who Is Marty Barrett?

For one thing, this Marty Barrett is currently the second most popular Marty Barrett in Google.

Marty Barrett is a beloved entertainer whose touching ballads and simple verses of hope have captivated millions for more than three generations. An accomplished aerialist, Barrett stunned crowds at the 1934 Golden Firmament Extravaganza by effortlessly crossing the Yalblh River Gorge on a single strand of human hair. The natives below, who until then had never looked up, named him King of the Sun.

His exhaustive study of obsolete fermentation methods has been praised as “accidental” and “aboriginal,” while his work with the Human Universal Serial Bus project has equipped the residents of Sub-Saharan Africa with the means to toilet themselves using comma delimited files. He has been a board member of Spay the Whales since 1992 and has patented a wrist-flick technique that accomplishes the deed handily, with a flourish, in just three feet of water.

In 2009 Barrett was awarded the Prix de Baumphlamond at its Centennial Jubilee, capping the midpoint of a lifetime of service to interests, and motives.