Today I outlived John Lennon.
When, at various times in my 28th year, I overcame the lifespans of Kurt Cobain, Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin, and Jimi Hendrix, I gave myself a pat on the back for not being so talented that I became self-destructive.
When I beat Jesus Christ Himself in the Spring of 2002 I was all like: Yes.
Today, a month and 30 days after my fortieth birthday, I realize that, when I go, it is getting more unlikely that people will say, “He was too young.” Instead, they will say, “I guess it was about goddamn time.”
This morning, “Across the Universe” started playing on my iPod as I stepped from the subway. I thought, “What have I accomplished in my life compared to John Lennon?”
Then I thought, “What have I accomplished in my life compared to Julian Lennon?”
These are dangerous thoughts. And there are well-meaning people in my life who would say, “Your lives are so different. You shouldn’t make comparisons like that. Think of Joe Walsh. He’d say that life’s been good to you so far.”
“That’s easy for Joe Walsh to say,” I’d say. “Joe Walsh won’t shut up with saying things like that.”
But what measures should I use? My own? I should generate my own standards? That’s insane. How can we live but by comparison with famous people?
Mark David Chapman had been reading “The Catcher in the Rye” when he murdered John Lennon as the latter stepped from a limo in 1980. The troubled Chapman approached Lennon for an autograph earlier in the evening.
A troubled man approached me on Wilshire Blvd. this morning. He invited me to a Scientology seminar. I declined. That was about it.
I’ll console myself with the fact that, recently, while watching one of John Lennon’s favorite movies, “El Topo,” at my friends’ Gaby and Erik’s house, I spied a copy of J.D. Salinger’s “Franny And Zooey” on their toilet.
Salinger is now 91. I hope I can at least write my version of “Valotte” by 2061.
See also: Nature loves her little surprises
Marty, I had strangely had the same thoughts of lack of achievement at 2 points in my life. At 27 I compared my achievements (unfavourably) to George Harrison whose Career as a Beatle was already OVER! I also had the same inverted messianic complex at 33. By the way, did you somehow hasten the death of JD Salinger to make your comments more poignant?
Dear Nadster,
I take responsibility for Salinger’s death, as I also caused Pat Morita’s by thinking about him.
http://www.martybarrett.com/ /i-might-have-killed-pat-morita/
So you know, I only think about you alive (especially since your parents said “You’re killing us.”)
Loved the aninmation set to “across…” It felt like a giant tab of liquid light, orange sunshine and purple haze were hitting all at once. i must nap now.
If John Lennon were alive today, he’d be making some of the worst sounding shit-ass music you’d heard in your ever-lovin’ life.